General Tso Says Follow Your Own Path to Cooking

My wife is out of town for a few days at her parents’ house. It’s a good time. We both can use a short break from each other every now and then. It gives me a chance to stay up late, get caught up on zombie movies, and play loud music in the mornings. It also gives me a chance to make my own meals.

Now, I gotta warn you. I don’t cook. Never have. I just never had the desire to learn. When my wife goes out of town, I eat like a bachelor, so she makes meals and freezes them or buys me frozen bag meals. The first thing to know about bag meals is that you don’t need to follow the instructions.

Last night’s supper was General Tso’s Chicken. Here’s the instructions followed by plenty of room for deviation.


1. If the meal is microwaveable, cook it that way. It’s faster.

2. Turn the stove eye on hot. Pour some oil into the pan/pot/kettle or whatever. I grabbed some of my wife’s blood orange EVOO, which smelled really good. Dump the chicken, veggies, and sauce in all at once and start stirring.

3. Stir often, because with the stove on hot, it’ll stick to the bottom really easy.

4. Grab whatever cup you have nearby, put in some water, and dump it into the pot. If it’s too much, don’t worry, you can just cook it away. I grabbed a Spider-Man Tervis cup I was drinking Mountain Dew out of. I put in way too much water and basically made it look like a soup, but, like I said, no problem.

5. Throw the rice bag in the microwave for a few minutes, and then dump it into the rest of the mix.

6. Stir everything until it looks done, it’s burnt, or the excess water has boiled away.

Done! Fill the pot with water and let it soak. That’ll make scraping out all the stuff that’s burnt to the bottom a little easier.

Now, where else can you say, “Screw the rules!” and follow your own path?

This message was written by Dr. David Powers. You can always find me at Thanks for reading!



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